Newlywed overcomes "Honeymoon Hangover"!! How he did it: Wily Veteran's Strategic Gamble on Mt. Davidson pays off!
Greg Lemond overcame a near fatal gunshot wound. Wilma Rudololph out-ran polio and scarlet fever. Lance Armstrong beat cancer. And on March 28,1998 Matt "The Broiler" Royston overcame a Honeymoon Hangover after just 8 days of marriage to take his 2nd straight Mountain Lion Race victory. Blasting over 16.4 miles of rugged San Francisco topography in just 1 hour 11 minutes and 54 seconds, the renowned veteran messenger cruised to the finish line in the Mission District ahead of surprise 2nd place finisher Clive Lightwood. The event raised $383 for Bicycles for Afghan Amputees Rehabilitation.
Official Results
14 racers-13 finished
1. Matt "The Broiler " Royston -- also 1st in Veteran's
Category
2. Clive Lightwood
3. Ginger Saybolt
4. Erik Zo
5. "Walker"
6. Joel Metz-also 1st in 1-speed category
7. Ralph-2nd in Veteran's
8. Isaac Guillermo Vallecillo Rodriguez
9. John Seagrave -- 3rd in Veteran's
10. Ritchie Ditta -- also 1st in Fixed Gear Category
11. James Kern
12. Tobias Heitkamp
13. Bok Choy Mathewson
SPECIAL THANKS!! To all our volunteers- Mary, Stuart, Ken, Joe,
Mike, Bill, Vince, Mikae, Jim Smith & D-Man the He-Man. To
Timbuk2-our Title Sponsor. To Zoic-our Clothing Sponsor.
Starting with a pack of 10 other racers from 22nd & Indiana-Broiler rode west on 22nd then turned left on Pennsylvania, then downhill and right on Caesar Chavez, then left on Marin and left the wrong way on Bayshore!! Then crossing over to the right side of Bayshore the pack turned right on Alemany. Proceeding south on Alemany the pack then entered the "X"-SF's Excelsior District where they zigzagged through the streets to reach the unnamed alley that was their first checkpoint. From there they rode to San Jose Avenue turning right and then going over the freeway on Baden to the approach to Glen Park neighborhood. They zigzagged through the Glen Park area to Ohlone Alley (although this alley has a sign it is not on any map!). From there they rode west to Congo. From there racers began to make strategic choices in their climb up Mt. Davidson-SF's highest point. Some began to assault the mountain from the south-zigzagging through the streets. Others rode north up O'Shaughnessy and then turned west on Del Vale. That's what the LOSERS did. Matt "The Broiler" Royston went north on O'Shaughnessy all the way to the Portola intersection. The eventual winner took this strategic gamble-adding distance to his route-to conserve his strength even though it put him behind such fiery competitors as Erik Zo and the surprising Clive Lightwood. From the windy corner of O'Shaughnessy & Portola, the Broiler turned south to zigzag through the streets to where La Bica Street stops at the edge of Mt. Davidson Park. From there he rode up the dirt path to the Cross marking SF's highest point. From the Cross-he retraced his route back to Portola & O'Shaughnessy and then proceeded north on Twin Peaks Blvd. At the corner of Panorama he turned left onto Panorama and then right on Midcrest going north (uphill) on that street to where it ends at a trail below Twin Peaks Blvd. There he dashed up the trail back to Twin Peaks Blvd. and then on to the checkpoint. It was on Twin Peaks that his conserved strength helped bring past his competitors. From Twin Peaks Broiler took off road trails and streets to Clarendon and then to the Mt. Sutro checkpoint near Johnstone & Behr. From this his last checkpoint he went down Clarendon to Clayton then to Corbett then down to upper Market. From there it was on to Diamond Heights Blvd. then he blasted down Clipper (reaching 51 mph!!). By the time he turned right on Church 3 blocks from the finish Matt Royston had clinched his 2nd straight Mountain Lion win.
Yours for a better Mountain
Lion (in 1999),
Howard
DAMON'S "BOOZE NOT BOMBS"
RACE
On Sunday February 8th, ten hearty souls showed up for the first ever Booze Not Bomb's Alley Cat Race. The entry fee was one six-pack, the winner takes all; the checkpoints were all bars. Stretching from South of Market to the Upper Haight to Golden Gate Park to the Avenues to North Beach back to the good ol' Mission, out of nine checkpoints 3 were required drinking spots, where you had to chug a beer. If you didn't, you wouldn't get you manifest signed. Although Kali's checkpoint wasn't a required drink spot, that didn't stop her from demanding that they either drink a beer or buy her one! A true booze hound tactic! Through the rain, wind, mud, and flying car doors, Away King and Doc King came in first scoring 10 six-packs. They finished in one hour, 30 minutes, 55 seconds, while riding a freakin' tandem bicycle!!! I guess four legs are better than two sometimes, Lur King came in second-winning a pint of Jim Beam-one hour 33 minutes. And Chris Skuglio came in third with one hour, 48 minutes, winning a 1/2 pint. Richie and Lisa came in Fourth and Fifth respectively winning a radio holster and water bottle, but nobody truly lost, for at the finish line there was a keg! Last place slug was Joe Corio, who won a can of Jolt Cola and some White Lightning chain lube!!! He also won Chris Hsiang's baffling extra point trivia questions that were centered around ducks??? Afterwards we swilled the keg and celebrated Eric Wilson's b-day while working on a hangover for Monday morning, proving real messengers drink and ride IN THE RAIN.
-Invo King #777
JEN ZEN'S "SAVE A LEAF WACK A THIEF SMOKE A SPLIFF" RACE
Okay, okay, I let down my Team Glue homegirls
'cos I didn't make DFL, but Jen Zen's race rocked. Joe Corio's
and Isaac Rodriguez's bikes had both been stolen from the Mountain
Lion Race after-party so before the party was even over, we all
jumped into action, planning this race. Turn-out was small, due
to the broiling black clouds shrouding the city, but nonetheless
$98 was raised for Isaac and Joe got a baby Krypto-either to lock
his next bike up with or pop a bike thief in the noggin with-his
choice. The theme was gardens and foliage, so we got to tour the
many alleys dotting the city with vegetative namesakes. Vegetate
was the word-since I started the race with such a hangover that
I thought it was Sunday and couldn't find Geary. Hooked up with
Eric Zo en transit and scored extra points for scaring Joel out
of his house. We all convened for a gleeful afterparty with much
bowling and many reptiles @ Black Dog, where Isaac delivered a
highly moving speech of gratitude, reminding us all the meaning
of the word: Messengosity. Ralph of Black Dog fame came in first-hoka
hey, Kola! Presidente Williams and Erik Zo tied for second, third
place was me-also taking Alpha & Omega places for women. Clive
took fourth, and finally En Vogue King raked in the most prizes
of all for coveted DFL place. And this time, we LOCKED OUR BIKES!
-America #826
WENDY'S "WHO'LL STOP THE RAIN" ALLEYCAT
The race didn't quite start promptly at 7:00 as I had anticiapated, but 22 racers left the Tempest somewhere close to that time to seek out 10 fountains in the downtown and soma aread of San Francisco. Tragedy struck right off the bat when Paul from Velocity broke the chain on his fixed gear at the start line. He started off about a half an hour later and finished the race, well not last. However, he didn't stop off to get dinner either.
Thanks to everyone else that raced-Lars,
Brandon, Issac, Pete F., Broiler, John Seagravey, Ginger, Eric
Zo, and Jason Whitehead. Special thanks to Timbuk 2 for the bag
and cool stuff, Eric Zo for the postcards and Maria for the bag
of soap. And St. Francis Place is at Third and Folsom. -Wendy
Timbuk2s party last night was, well,
fucking NUTS...
grey put together a *fantastically* long and difficult alleycat,
p-roj and T2 put together a great party, beer flowed freely and
people got, well, crazy. the race started around 745-8ish. format
worked something like this. grey gave the 1st checkpoint at the
start, which was the name of an alley. somewhere on that alley
was the next alleys name on a sticker. some of the alleys had
secondary questions like "how many pictures are in the window
of #21?" and the like. after 9 alleys like this, leading
us from the bayshore area to the mission district, then way out
by anza, then into the fillmore and then north beach, we had to
rush back into south park in soma to pick up part 2! part 2 was
a list of 6 tiny alleys downtown, each of which had a word on
a sticker somewhere in it. we were to collect all 6 words, make
a poem from them, and then head back to the finish @ T2. i think
some people may have split up and done the poem part in teams
(cheaters).
total race course time for the winners
was around 2 hours 20 minutes!!! course mileage was estimated
at somewhere between 28 and 35 miles! as far as i know, it was
the *longest* alleycat i can remember having been in in sf...
mostof the races end up being about 15-20miles...and grueling
in termsof hills we had to deal with - we hit the top of potrero
hill and messed around up top of lombard as well... not to mention
having to run from checkpoint 4 (?) to checkpoint 5, which was
all the way across town from the mission to north of the panhandle...and
north beach on the 4th is HELL.
Couple people got tickets, couple people got chased by angry motorists,
and the womens race got totally screwed up when a large chunk
of the women got chased around on potrero hill or something like
that... but in the end, the basic finishingorder was like such:
MEN:
1. the right reverend jim kaiser
2. sean thornton (bumped down on manifest errors, and denied the
ticket to dc! ouch!)
3. tom finley (dms management guy, in from new zealand, and sucking
all the right wheels! whatever else I may say about dms tom, fucking
brillant job there.)
WOMEN:
1. megan from s-car-go (the only woman to completely finish the
course out of a meager 9 starters - megan missed the checkpoint
volunteers at south park (they were gone when she got there, came
into T2, got the alleys from grey and went back and did them!
thats determination!)so its megan and the reverend flying to dc
on timbuk2s bill! fucking great,kids!
the party just got crazier and crazier from that point on, culminated in sf finest being called on some local homies for *trashed* jack andersons sweet newall-campy bianchi for no reason (after hed ridden out from kansas to be here for this), and nearly started a full-scale street fight with us - absolutely fucking NUTS. bands were great, beer was great, tons of people spilling out all over the street - I pity the T2 crew for what they will have to clean up this morning... we had party-crashers of the worst description... but all is well in the end...
as for myself, I pulled 4th officially, the first person across the line actually wearing a messenger bag, and beating a large chunk of the road racing crew cause they were standing around at the end of treat street trying to figure out what their poems were going to be and where Grey was in the crowd of people while I just rode straight into the crowd, having written my poem on the way down harrison st, and found Grey in the middle of the mess. (gloat gloat gloat) full results and all that should happen monday sometime - Grey was drunk out of his skull and completely incapable of announcing and/or giving out prizes, buti know there's tons of swag, so he'll sober up today and figure things out, I suppose :) ahhhhhh... alleycat racing.
keep the spirit!
-joel