Hello boys and girls!
A few weeks ago we handed out a survey to get some kind of idea
of the best and worst aspects of being a messenger in San Francisco
are. Below are your answers, not to be confused with our answers.
Let us remember that it's all in fun, so no coming to me later
complaining. You got it?! -WendyBest Company to Work For:
1st Place goes to No Messenger Company. I guess many of you don't think there are any good messenger companies.
2nd Place goes to Western Messenger.
Best answer: Some messenger company in Germany.
Worst Company to Work For:
1st Place goes to Advanced.
2nd Place goes to Ultra X.
3rd Place goes to The DMS.
Nicest Receptionist:
1st Place goes to Rager.
2nd Place goes to any receptionist with good or candy.
Meanest Receptionist/Guard:
1st Place goes to Bascom, the guard at 750 Battery.
2nd Place goes to the receptionist at Blue Shield in 50 Fremont.
Honorable Mention to the answers: "Bitchface at Crosby," and "Ho at Pac Bell Stadium office on third."
Most Annoying Building:
1st Place goes to 345 California.
2nd Place goes to 901 Market.
3rd Place goes to 101 California.
Least Annoying Building:
1st Place goes to 220 Montgomery/270 Bush (the Mills Building).
2nd Place is a tie between 555 California, 388 Market, and 1 Bush.
Slowest Elevator:
1st Place was a run away win: 101 California.
2nd Place goes to 123 Townsend.
Fastest Elevator:
1st Place goes to 555 California.
2nd Place goes to 600 Montgomery.
Weirdest answer: escalator.
Answer most likely given by an Ultra X longboarder: 2645 Ocean.
Biggest Pothole Downtown:
1st Place goes to the one at Montgomery and Bush.
2nd Place goes to Ron's Bowl.
Honorable Mentions to Ben Thompson and "The hole in my ass."
Worst Street:
1st Place is Market Street. Hey Willie Brown! Are you paying attention to this? Close Market Street!
2nd Place goes to Montgomery Street.
3rd Place goes to 6th Street.
Slowest Street:
1st Place goes to Market Street. Hey Willie Brown! I bet it would be a lot faster if there were no cars on it.
2nd Place goes to Montgomery Street. I think we're seeing a pattern here.
Honorable Mention goes to the answers, "There are no slow streets when you're on a bike" and "Up a hill."
Fastest Street:
1st Place goes to Third Street.
2nd Place goes to The Embarcadero or Herb Caen Way.
Honorable Mention goes to the answer, "Down a hill."
Craziest Driver/Messenger:
1st Place goes to John Wayne Wrongly.
2nd Place goes to Spanky.
3rd Place goes to Seth Goodman.
Craziest Driver/Civilian:
1st Place goes to our friends behind the [driving] wheels of the Muni Buses.
2nd Place goes to All Drivers.
3rd Place goes to My Mom. Well, not my mom, though she is bad, but a collective vote for our moms.
Most Dangerous Messenger:
1st Place goes to Seth Goodman.
2nd Place goes to John Wayne Wrongly, cause if lovin' him is wrongly, I don't want to be rightly.
Worst Bike Ridden by a Messenger:
1st Place goes to Roy Robinson's bike.
2nd Place goes to the old Aero Tanks.
Honorable Mention goes to the answer, "Mine. Buy me a new one."
Drunkest Old School Messenger:
1st Place goes to McIlroy.
2nd Place goes to Mike Crane.
Best Place to Catch a Buzz:
1st Place goes to The Wall.
2nd Place goes to between the Hubba Hideout, Jackson Park, and Home.
Best Place to Get a Cheap/Fast Lunch:
1st Place goes to the Pac and Snack at 605 Battery.
2nd Place goes to Lee's.
Best Place for Coffee:
1st Place goes to Peet's.
2nd Place goes to Pasqual.
Best Place to Stand-by:
1st Place goes to The Wall.
2nd Place goes to Jackson Park.
3rd Place goes to One Post.
Kindest Bar to Messengers:
1st Place goes to The Tempest.
2nd Place goes to Annie's.
3rd Place goes to The Zeitgeist.
Nicest Looking Messenger:
1st Place goes to the answer Me. Had you put your names on the surveys I might have known who you were. As it is, I win this category!
2nd Place goes to Trina.
Honorable Mention goes to, "No such thing!"
Messenger in Most Need of a Make Over:
1st Place goes to Mike Crane.
2nd Place goes to Mike Russo.
Honorable Mention goes to "All of us."
Most Stylish Messenger:
1st Place goes to Gina, from NOBS.
2nd Place goes to Jamie (some stated only when he is wearing a dress).
3rd Place goes to Eddie Arnold, from Ultra X.
Laziest Messenger:
1st Place goes to Che, from Battery Point.
2nd Place goes to Kali, formerly from Express Network.
Honorable Mention goes to the answer, "There's no such thing."
Best Reason Not to Wear a Helmet:
Truck question! There isn't one. Some good answers include: "I have a boil on my forehead," "Cool spot for road rash;" and "Chicks dig scars."
Best Reason for Not Coming In:
1st Place goes to Diarrhea.
2nd Place goes to Sex, either you want to get it, or you got too much the night before (yeah, right!).
Best Bathroom:
1st Place goes to 1 Bush.
2nd Place goes to 600 Townsend.
3rd Place goes to 235 Montgomery, for the free tampons from PMS.
Best Messenger Nickname:
1st Place goes to Leatherpants. Or Leathertrousers, if you want to be formal.
2nd Place goes to Mongo.
Honorable Mention goes to WoWo as being the most fitting.
Best Nickname for a Building:
1st Place goes to the many nicknames for 101 California: Paranoia Palace, 101 Kill, Gun o' 1 Killofornia, and Ton o' Fun Cal.
2nd Place goes to 555 California: Triple Nickel [aka Triple Nipple]
3rd Place goes to 850 Bryant: The Hall of Injustice.
And finally... The Best Reason for Doing This Job:
1st Place goes to being outside.
2nd Place goes to good friends.
Honorable Mentions go to the answers: "To be a hero in my own mind," "I can smoke weed with impunity," "ACTION! So much exciting action, in so many shapes and sizes... and free candy," and "No Super Vision [sic]."